A LITTLE HISTORY ABOUT WEDDING RINGS!

 

The History

By now you know the name of my business is “With This Ring, I Thee Wedd Ceremonies.” When I started my business 29 years ago, I thought those words were so romantic. And I still view them the same way, however, it’s a long business name with one-word intentionally misspelled. I’ve learned over the years from my couples, they don’t always want to exchange rings at that moment. Also, maybe because of their career, a ring isn’t always appropriate. In Western culture, a wedding ring can be traced to ancient Rome and Greece.

Many couples choose to wear their wedding band on their left hand, fourth finger, typically known as the “ring” finger. Often a bride/groom will move their engagement ring to their right hand prior to the ceremony and afterwards, moves their engagement ring back to the left hand, ring finger. Why? Tradition says there’s a vein that runs directly from the ring finger to the heart although science doesn’t support this claim. It’s a purely sentimental tradition to wear the wedding band closer to the heart.

My Thoughts Regarding My Wedding Rings!

Photo courtesy of Lynn Dunston

On a personal note, I asked my husband for an anniversary band one Christmas. I thought when we traveled, I would wear that ring and leave my engagement ring and wedding bands home. [Yes bands, I wear my mom’s gold wedding bands. I’m terribly sentimental. Floyd wears my stepfather’s band.]

Floyd’s initial comment after my request was, “Leora, whether you wear a ring or not, you are still married.” I gave him a look that said, “really!” Needless to say, Floyd exceeded my expectations and gifted me a beautiful anniversary band. I wear it all the time!

I have reflected many times on what Floyd said about a wedding band. A ring doesn’t define my marital status, I do. When I respect the relationship we share, when I read articles to enhance our relationship and share with him what I learned, and when I’m present for Floyd, I’m demonstrating I’m married and committed to the success of our relationship. The ring may say to the world, I love and am loved, but I bet the average stranger could care less about my marital status, they have more important things to focus on.

Sometimes I refer to this passage because it's not about wear a ring, it's about acting a way that respects my marriage, Floyd and me: “Put on then…beloved, compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, and patience, forbearing one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other...and above all these put-on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”

My Challenge to You

I invite you to think about what your ring(s) means to you. What do you do daily to express to your partner you are committed for life to the success of your relationship? Yes, I mean daily. You are mistaken if you don’t think your relationship requires your attention daily. Make a gesture daily to reaffirm your vows and affirm your partner. Don’t wait for your anniversary to celebrate each other and your relationship. You, your partner and your marriage are worthy of daily celebrations!

 

 AMAZING OUTDOOR VENUES FOR MINI-WEDDINGS IN THE DMV AREA

APRIL 12, 2021

CONSIDER AN OUTDOOR SPRING OR SUMMER MINI-WEDDING IN DC., MARYLAND, OR VIRGINIA

Happy Spring! Warmer temperatures, blooming trees, shrubs, perennials and annuals are calling many of us to the great outdoors. We are walking, biking, and going from point A to point B on a scooter or skateboard. We are sitting on the grass, with and without a blanket or on the steps on famous and infamous buildings taking in the beauty of the DMV (District of Columbia, Maryland and Virginia). The pandemic is keeping all of us closer to home which is allowing us to explore our neighborhoods and others’ neighborhoods. 

Photo credit: www.michellejonesphoto.com

This calendar year I’ve asked couples to meet me outdoors at local parks for their mini-wedding ceremony. During the pandemic, although I prefer officiating wedding outdoors for safety reasons, I have taken steps at indoor ceremonies to protect the couple and me such as standing at least 6 feet apart and opening windows when possible. Of the 40+ mini-ceremonies I had the privilege of officiating the first quarter of 2021, less than 10% were conducted indoors. My couples are quite flexible which makes me appreciate them so much.

Photo credit: www.michellejonesphoto.com

OUTDOOR VENUES IN OLD TOWN ALEXANDRIA AND THE POTOMAC

In the Old Town Alexandria area, you could find me officiating an intimate wedding ceremony at the public gardens at The Carlyle House Historic Park. What a hidden gem! I also met couples at the Alexandria Waterfront Park which is always alive with people, children and dogs. Jones Point Park offers scenic views of the Potomac River along with MGM National Harbor Resort and Casino; National Harbor; the Ferris Wheel; and a replica of Air Force One. There is so much to Jones Point Park to explore. The Woodrow Wilson Bridge spans part of the park and the arches of the bridge offer spectacular opportunities for amateur and professional photographers. There’s also a lighthouse in the park which is surrounded by flowering trees, perfect for wedding photos.

Another favorite is Green Spring Farm Park in Fairfax County. The Park has two gazebos with totally different vibes that are available for rent. The various gardens are colorful havens and great for wedding photos.

OUTDOOR VENUES AND PARKS IN THE DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA

In the District of Columbia, the Tidal Basin, D.C. War Memorial, the monuments, Meridian Park, Hains Point, The Spanish Steps, Rawlins Park and Bartholdi are great choices. Something is always blooming at these parks. Remember beautiful Crepe Myrtles bloom June through September and are just as pretty as Dogwoods and Cherry Trees! 

So, if you are looking for atmosphere, vibrant colors, conversation starters, art works, maybe shelter from them elements for a small, intimate wedding, check out the parks in your neighborhood. You also have the opportunity to “pay it forward” by making a donation to the park!

No Ceremony, Just Make It Legal!

 Several times a month, I will receive a call or email message from a couple interested in fulfilling the legal requirement to be married with the qualifier, no ceremony! Ceremony is defined as "a formal act or set of formal acts established by custom or authority as proper to a special occasion, such as a wedding, religious rite, etc." I cannot sign a marriage license without gaining the consent of the individuals involved. At a minimum, I have to ask, "do you take this person to be your legally wedded spouse?" If you have a celebration planned for a later date that includes family and friends, please note that the date your marriage license is signed by an individual who has local authority to sign a marriage license is the date the court views as the date you were married. You may have a celebratory event at a later time and you may recognize that date as your "anniversary," but the date on your marriage license is the date you were legally married. So why not make it special and memorable? It doesn't take away from the celebratory event planned for another day.

I suggest you use standard traditional vows for the legal ceremony knowing that you can expand the traditional vows for your celebratory event by adding personal pledges. For example, the tradition vows are: "I, [name] take you, [name] to be my lawfully wedded spouse. I promise to love and cherish you, in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better for worse, and forsaking all others, keep myself only unto you, for so long as we both shall live." For the celebratory gathering, you could add, "During our marriage, I promise to help you when you ask for help and ask you to help me when I ask for help." 

Also, do you know the law doesn't require the exchange of rings? That particular gesture traces back to ancient Egyptians who reportedly exchanged wedding rings dating back to 4000 BC. The wedding ring is a circle symbolizing the never-ending union of marriage. So if you would rather save the ring exchange for the event that includes family and friends, please do so. 

Before I sign the license, I pronounce you legally wed and invite you to share a kiss to seal your promises! You participated in a brief ceremony and now you are ready to begin you happily ever after!

Love Prevails During a Pandemic

Hello!

The during the first two months of 2020, love was alive and well! I officiated 16 weddings during that period. This includes a variety of elopements, formal and informal ceremonies with guests in attendance and license signings. One signing occurred at a restaurant while the couple was enjoying lunch although they stopped eating long enough to say, "I do!" This highlights you can be as non-traditional as you want to be. Oh, I had two couples marry on February 29, Leap Day!

I took a break and didn't work the month of March. Instead I got organized and worked on draft ceremony scripts for couples planning to marry later in the year. 

My first wedding impacted by Covid-19 was scheduled for March 29, 2020. Then many of my April weddings either rescheduled for late 2020 or postponed until 2021. This was true for much of the rest of the year. Some weddings moved forward, but redesigned. This pattern continued through October. I'm happy to report the couple scheduled to marry March 29 married November 8, 2020 in the presence of a downsized gathering of family and friends.

Although Covid-19 dictated the size of weddings, it didn't stop couples from marrying. I'm grateful to all the couples I had the privilege of meeting and standing with on their wedding day!

One of the highlights of the 2020 wedding season was officiating at venues new to me. I was at Lars Anderson House, a Gilded Age mansion located in NW, DC; The Mansion at Strathmore located in North Bethesda; Fathom Gallery, an intimate space with a lovely rooftop garden in NW, DC; Bartholdi Park, SW; The Spy Museum; The Barn at Pleasant Acres, St. Leonard, Maryland; MGM atrium, National Harbor, Maryland; and The Conrad Hotel, NW, DC. 

Another highlight was the magical, intimate vibe so many of these weddings emitted. The floral designs and colors were bright, vibrant, rich and stunning. Add to the beautiful flowers draping, arches, arbors, hanging tealights, and potted plants and the romantic feel became real. Also, many times there were more vendors in attendance then guests. We got an opportunity to interact more closely and learn more about each other's craft. 

Many venues took the temperature of all attendees or a family member was assigned this duty. Hand sanitizer was everywhere and often times the guests and vendors wore a mask. 

Love survived in 2020! Many, many couples realized they wanted to be together during this unprecedented time. So they postponed the big party and the adventurous honeymoon. They surrounded themselves with the people who love them the most and they love. Thankfully there were various mediums like Facebook, FaceTime, live streaming and Zoom that allowed people who couldn't physically attend still celebrate and champion the couple's wedding festivities.

I move into the 2021 wedding season hopeful because I know love prevails!

Leora

What A Glorious Year!

Hello Friends! I can't believe I haven't told you anything about the current wedding season, 2019. It has been a great year, filled with laughter, heartfelt moments and happy tears! My 2019 wedding season began in April at Fort Belvoir's Officer's Club with Gloria and Leo. In May I officiated a wedding ceremony in the Silver Slugger Suite at Nationals Park. What an awesome experience!! From the time I arrived until the final pitch, I felt like I had been transported to a different world. The attendants were attentive, the couple glowed, the guests were mesmerized and the Nationals beat the Cubs. June found me at the Springfield Country Club, Bon Air Rose Garden, Carnegie Institution for Science and Zion Springs Farm. In July I was at Woodlawn Plantation and 2941 Restaurant. August I stood with a couple at the District Winery and in August I was at Herrington on the Bay. 1757 Golf Club and Kent Island Manor. September started at one of my favorite venues, The Carlyle House and from there I went to the Piedmont Club, Embassy Suites, Harbour View and River Farm. On October 4 I stood with David and Kathleen at the Winery at Bull Run on a beautiful fall afternoon. Saturday October 5, I had the honor of standing with Meaghan and David at The Line in DC. 

I am blessed to have 10 more weddings before the 2019 wedding season concludes. I will be at a private home, Airlie Conference Center, Potomac Point Winery and Restaurant, the Tower Club, Embassy Suites, The Ritz, Riverside on the Potomac and 2941 Restaurant. And each of these weddings will be marked by the special rapport I share with each of the couples.

I close this post with the following poem by James Weldon Johnson, a 2018 couple introduced me to...I'm moved by the words and sentiment. 

“When buffeted and beaten by life's storms,

When by the bitter cares of life oppressed,

I want no surer haven than your arms,

I want no sweeter heaven than your breast.

When over my life's way there falls the blight

Of sunless days, and nights of starless skies; 

Enough for me, the calm and steadfast light

That softly shines within your loving eyes.

The world, for me, and all the world can hold

Is circled by your arms;

for me there lies,

Within the lights and shadows of your eyes,

The only beauty that is never old.”

An Amazing 2018 Wedding Season, Part II

Greetings! I shared in An Amazing 2018 Wedding Season, Part I blog post that I would post a recap of the weddings I officiated the last two months of 2018. On November 2, I was at Harbour View in Woodbridge. The owner, Lisa Krauss, is a jewel! She and her team are awesome, doing whatever is needed to make the day special for the couple. Chris and Camille are in love and in like! They are such a special couple and so much fun to be around. Camille and Chris' ceremony ended with the following quote, a quote tattooed on the arm of a July bride, Erika.  "Hold fast to dreams for if dreams die, life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly. Hold fast to dreams for when dreams go, life is a barren field, frozen with snow." Dreams by Langston Hughes

Laura Ritchie, Principal Event Designer, Grit & Grace, introduced me to Joey and Emily who wed at Salamander Resort and Spa, Middleburg. They wed late afternoon November 3, outside. It was a bit chilly, but we made it. I know I say all of my couples are beautiful, but they really are! With Emily and Joey's involvement, we crafted a ceremony that was meaningful to them, full of love, passion and humor. From the vows exchanged, each promised "to love...in the good times as well as the bad and even more during the ugly." Marriage is wonderful, however it does require daily work.

On November 11 at The Little Inn of Washington, Nailah and Jack married. It was a brisk afternoon and yet the couple married on a grassy knoll in the presence of nature's glory. It was just the couple, the photographer and me. The ceremony began with the following quote penned by Maya Angelou, "In all the world, there is no heart for me like yours. In all the world, there is no love for you like mine."

Often weddings take me to a new venue...this time to Zion Springs Farm. Jasmine and Sydney married November 17, 2018 on a chilly day, but the brides prevailed and married in the presence of their families and friends as the sun was setting. They are beautiful young women, full of life, love, and potential! The brides penned their vows that were marked with passion and humor. And then the party began and what a party it was.

I was blessed to officiate 4 weddings at 2941 Restaurant during the year. My last wedding for 2018 at this venue was December 1. Lusia and Victor married on a rainy day, but the sun shined fully on them as they said "I do!" The energy in the room was awesome and I thoroughly enjoyed my time with this special couple and their guests. The staff at 2941 is awesome and responsive which makes 2941 one of my favorite venues!

December 8 took me to a loft apartment in Old Town Alexandria for Connor and Amanda's ceremony in the presence of their families. The couple incorporated several touches to personalize their union and involve their families.

Harbour View welcomed me again on December 15 for Charlotte and Mauricio's wedding. The decor was magical with tiny white lights and draping along with Disney themed touches such as the centerpieces on the dinner tables...a single red rose under glass...a nod to the movie Beauty and the Breast! And I added several quotes from various Disney movies to the script that resonated with the couple. Thanks for allowing me the freedom to balance your desires with reverence suitable for such a major step as marriage.

Who would have thought that a lovely couple who met at Gadsby's Tavern at an English Country Dance would ask me to officiate their wedding ceremony in the presence of their families and friends! Well, Charles and Michelle did just that. I concluded their ceremony with an excerpt from Gift From the Sea about the importance of being in the moment. After the kiss, the happy couple danced a waltz. Oh, did I mention they and about half of their guests were dressed in period clothing? It was grand!

The 2018 wedding season was amazing...I met so many wonderful couples who decided to take their relationship to the next level, marriage. And I was invited to stand with them on their wedding day to witness their exchange of I do's. I'm excited for 2019, who knows where I will be and who I will be with...it really doesn't matter much, every wedding I have the honor of officiating is grand!!

An Amazing 2018 Wedding Season, Part I

The 2018 wedding season began for me on January 27, 2018 at the Carnegie Institute of Science in DC. The bride wore a beautiful gown that took my back to the elegance of Jackie O! The groom wore tails and the decor was over the top. In March, I was at the Athenaeum in Old Town Alexandria for an intimate late afternoon ceremony. 

In April, I had the honor of officiating a wedding at the Fairmont Hotel in DC. The attire was black tie and the wedding party and guests were stunning in tuxedos and ball gowns. The bride was stunningly beautiful and her groom was so handsome. 

I enjoyed a wedding held at DAR, it's historical and regal and it holds so much history. Everytime I'm there to officiate a wedding, I am humbled by the opportunity I currently have and the opportunity denied to opera singer Marian Anderson. 

At the Salamander Resort in Middleburg, VA, in May, at the request of the bride and groom, I read Beauty That Is Never Old by James Weldon Johnson at their wedding...a passionate and romantic poem. 

Have you been to District Winery in DC yet? I was there to officiate a wedding in June and again in September. Both couples are fantastic and huge dog-lovers. The views from the rooftop are amazing. 

Fate took my back to DAR in July for a formal ceremony that was absolutely beautiful! A violinist played during the ceremony and a live band had everyone on the dance floor. In August, on a warm and humid day, in Haymarket, I had the honor of standing with two brides that at the time were both on active duty. I had such great fun.

The September weddings were over the top gorgeous and I was blessed to stand with some amazing couples in Falls Church (2941), Leesburg (Raspberry Plain and ROTP), DC (District Winery, La Vie and Hotel Monaco), and Middleburg ( Goodstone Inn). 

A very happy couple stood in the 250 year old stables of Riverside on the Potomac in Leesburg and said, "I do," in October. October ended with a wedding at Jones Point Park on a cold, rainy day, but the brides' smiles were not diminished!

Stay tuned to learn about my experiences during the months of November and December. 

I truly love what I do, I have the opportunity to meet awesome couples doing wonderful things in their communities. Why do I love meeting,  learning and embracing what's important to these couples? Each couple allows me into their lives, sharing intimacies and trusting me not to violate their trust. And on their wedding day, I watch their expressions as they pledge to be a couple forever. It doesn't get much better!